Sherry and Alice have been together 29 years and do not consider themselves exceptional. Actually they describe themselves as boringly normal. Like so many gay couples of their generation, their commitment evolved and they do not have an anniversary date and have not experienced the public celebration that usually occurs on anniversaries.
The first Pride celebration was so special for them because it was a very public acknowledgement of their 26 year relationship and particularly amazing because of the 20,000 + cheering people lining the parade route calling the names of each legacy couple as they passed.
Sherry and Alice expressed surprise that there were so many legacy couples. Many of these couples were meeting each other for the first time and found the experience affirming of their own paths and for the entire LGBT community. Legacy couples talked to each other about their feelings and about their hope that the path would be easier for the next generations.
During the parade there were moments that were particularly poignant. One young couple yelled, ?We want to be you in 20 years.? Another common question was ?Tell us how to do if?? Many just said ?Thanks.?
Honoring the legacy couples is a community validation of not only love but of the work and commitment that goes into sustaining a relationship. Some of the younger members of the LGBT community were curious the challenges of gay relationships such as family responses, and reactions in the workplace.
?We were thrilled to support the Pride celebration four years ago Sherry?s son David and his partner Sean drove our car in the parade and made the event that much more poignant. We had no idea what to expect and we NEVER would have imagined 20,000 people cheering and calling our names. As we rode down Ocean Drive we waved to couples of all types and lots of children. One of the most touching memories (Sherry still cries when she tells the story) of young woman saying we inspired them.?
Rarely is there a time for introspection about the factors that facilitate the survival of a long-term relationship such as commitment, compromise, communication, caring and common values.
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As a Board member for Pridelines Youth Services, being a Legacy Couple has a deeper meaning and significance than proudly acknowledging my 24-year relationship with my partner Greg,? said Richard Murry. ?By walking with the Pridelines youth, instead of being on the Legacy Couple float, we are able to interact with these young people throughout the Parade as role models for lasting and committed relationships.?At?a time in their lives when a ?relationship? lasts all of three weeks,?and headlines abound with youth suicides and homelessness, we are living proof for these kids that a happy relationship can also be a reality for them.
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I have been asked how it felt when I and my partner Tom sat on the back of my convertible holding a sign, and not a small sign either, proclaiming our love for each other in the Miami Beach Gay Pride Parade. We will be celebrating our 30th anniversary this April.
It felt surreal is the best way I can put it. You must remember I came from a simple Italian family in the very macho section of Brooklyn, New York and for me to be in this relationship for one thing was and is hard to believe, but to be out in public sitting on a vehicle holding a sign with, get this, my cousin and my Aunt giving a new meaning of the words ?Tutte Familia?, in the front of the car voicing their support was truly surreal. Sitting on my convertible I could not fathom this moment if it wasn?t for people like Rosa Parks saying, ?NO,? and not getting off her seat on a bus because of the color of her skin; or those wonderful drag queens in Stonewall, on the day of Judy Garland?s funeral, showing the NYPD that high heels hurt; and having famous people like Ellen DeGeneres and Harvey Milk come out of the closet with so much to lose. So now I, the little Italian from Brooklyn, have a responsibility to the many LGBT youth. Like those before me, making it possible for me to, not only think about being in a Gay Parade but, actually publically proclaiming my love for Tom.
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